Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Day 163 of 365: Don't Listen to the Pretty Girl

Don't listen to the pretty girl, because how could she ever relate? What does she know of suffering or pain? Don't listen, for her qualms are the very definition of First World Problems.

Don't listen to the ugly girl, because what could she possibly say that would hold your interest? And even so, she's just saying it to make up for her lack of physical attractiveness.

Don't listen to the skinny girl. Skinny bitches don't know how good they have it. Whatever problems they are facing are not nearly as bad as they think they are.

Don't listen to the fat girl. What could she possibly know about proper body image when her body isn't the societal ideal?

Don't listen to the girl who wears makeup. She cares way too much about her appearance to have anything worthwhile to say. She's as vapid as the compact holding her powdered concealer.

Don't listen to the girl who doesn't wear makeup. She doesn't care about how she presents herself to the world, so why should we care about what she has to say?

Don't listen to the optimistic girl. We've had enough of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl, thank you very much.

Don't listen to the cynical girl. Obviously she's going through a breakup, or on her period, or whatever.

Don't listen to the girl who had a difficult past. She's damaged goods. No one wants to hear about how her daddy issues shaped her views on gun laws and health care and immigration.

Don't listen to the girl who had a secure, stable upbringing. She's way too soft to have any proper opinion on anything.

Don't listen to the artistic girl. Artistic girls are crazy.

Don't listen to the pragmatic girl. Pragmatic girls just wish they were boys.

Don't listen to the outspoken girl. She's just trying to compensate for something. Besides, who has time for all that blather and babble?

Don't listen to the soft-spoken girl. If she really had something important to say, she'd be more outspoken about it.

Don't listen to the career-minded girl, the career-ambivalent girl, the girl with a five-year plan, the girl who doesn't have it all figured out, the girl who follows the rules, the girl who rebels, the girl who refuses to be labeled or the girl who understands society's impulse to label everything. I'm sure you can find a reason to ignore them perfectly well on your own.

Besides, why should you listen to me?

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