Saturday, February 1, 2014

Day 180 of 365: What Grounds You

I just got back from my yoga teacher training classes. Like every other time getting home, I parked my car in the garage, hung my keys up in our pseudo-mudroom in the basement, and walked up the stairs to the first floor. I opened the door and saw two sets of flowers in two of our post-wedding vases: one on the kitchen island and one on the dining room table.

"You seemed a little depressed over all the bad winter weather, so I figured I would brighten up the place with some nice spring colors," explained my husband.

I don't know what it is, but there is something about being surprised with flowers that gets me every time. I recognize the silliness when you strip it down to its must objective core: here, I bought some clipped plants. Because they are shaped in a way to entice bees, we consider them pretty. Here, enjoy them for two days before they die. But, oh well. It's an incredible wonderful token of affection.

I couldn't help but think about the very first hour of my class today. As part of a writing exercise, the instructor told us to list all the things that ground us. It could be physical: running, yoga, tai chi, etc. It could be creative: writing, drawing, dancing, etc. Or it could be intrapersonal: spending time with family, your husband, your cats (and cats are people, dammit). And, alongside running, yoga, tai chi, writing, drawing, dancing, I wrote, "my husband".

I honestly don't know where I would be without my husband to ground me. Plain and simple: he gets me. He not only tolerates the bullshit I can sometimes pull, but he understands where it is coming from and knows how to call me out on it without sounding accusatory. He knows how to challenge me even when I don't want to be challenged. He knows when to give me solutions and when I just need a hug. He has been the driving force behind why I've been attempting to transform my mind -- why I'm trying transition from a very hysterical girl who lets her past, her emotions, the situation get the best of her, into a better, more capable (and for lack of a better term) warrior.

This is sappy as all getout and I don't mind it. I needed something to write before darting off to watch UFC at our friends' place and the flowers inspired me to wax romantical about that dude I vowed to spend the rest of my life with.

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